by Vicky Lumsden

it is not unusual to have strong feelings for a female friend

What is a lesbian?

Lesbians are women who are generally only sexually attracted to other women. They feel emotionally closer to other women and have a desire to be with women rather than men. Lesbianism is essentially women who love women.

How do I know if I am a lesbian?

Many women, teenagers in particular may as some point question their sexuality. It is not unusual to have such strong feelings for a female friend that you wonder if there is a sexual element. But you can you tell if you are a lesbian? Well, you will feel generally turned on by women. When you watch television for instance you feel attracted to the actresses rather an the actors. When you socialize with boys/men you may not have any sexual thoughts about them at all. You may also feel confused because you're attracted to both men and women. This doesn't necessary mean you are staring, lesbian or bisexual. As we grow and develop, our sexual preferences will become clearer. Many straight married women had relationships with other women in their youth. And likewise many lesbian women had several relationships with men when they were younger. Sometimes it just takes time to decide what you really want.

Coming out as a lesbian is the process of accepting your sexual orientation and no longer keeping it secret. Telling your family of your lesbianism can be a daunting task particularly if you think they will be less than happy. Fortunately, we live in a much more open minded society so you may be surprised at how will your parents take the news. Of course you can't expect them to be overjoyed but you can expect them to respect your decision. Almost every homosexual has to go through this process so there are million of people out there who can give you advice on this difficult matter.

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